Despair

Everyone is planning for the July NADAC show and I'm just so depressed. Shane and I practice 3 times a day in the backyard and he is phenomenal. I want to enter that show so badly, but I just can't risk it. How could it come to this? Having a dog that is so good and not being able to compete with him. It's like the universe is laughing at me.

A woman on the sheltie listserv lost a champion dog and she wrote today that she doesn't remember one competition. All she remembers is the fun times with her dog. That is one thing I do have. Fun times with Shane. He is just the most loving wonderful dog. We have our issues, but it comprises a small part of our day. I don't remember specific runs with Jake and Woody, but I do remember spending the entire weekend with them having a good time at shows. I want to have that with Shane as well, but it might never happen.

Today, Shane and I waited at the curb for a car to pull out of the driveway. The woman stopped her car and rolled down the window. "What a good dog," she said. If she only knew.